This particular painting, which no longer exists in this way, was causing me problems. I was dissatisfied with the composition at the top and I could not seem to get it to reflect what originally drew me to the topic - the temporality of the daylily with its one day lifespan. As a painting I found my attempt somewhat boring and it didn't live up to the level of "sophistication" I had achieved in some of the other paintings in the series. When I presented this work in an earlier post, I had several excellent suggestions from my readers, all of which I took under advisement. They helped to get me thinking.
This is what the painting now looks like. It either works or it doesn't work at all. My solutions are usually like that. I reach a point where I just say "Go for it!" As for a title... maybe DaybreakComments greatly appreciated especially those of a critical nature...
10 comments:
Susan Webb Tregay always says "cure it or kill it" when it comes to fixing a painting. I think you've cured it! I imported the image of your revised painting into my photoshop program, transformed it into grayscale, and flipped it over and around to check for balance in your composition. It's very balanced. Then I looked at the grayscale values you've established, and they're pleasing and flow nicely throughout the composition. Next, I considered how you treated to top of the painting versus the middle and bottom. At first, I thought that the green webbing at the top was too different from the rest of the painting, but as I continued to look it became a very interesting detail that didn't overwhelm the rest of the work. So, I had to think long and hard about the incongruity you established. So far, I'm OK with it. I really like the way you challenge yourself to move beyond easy solutions. That's really, really great!!
Oops -- another thought! What if you repeated the webbing at the top in the vertical leaves at the bottom by using darker colors for the webbing, and just bits of it here and there weaving through the leaves. It might better tie together the top and bottom. Just a suggestion :-)
Ah Kathy,
We are so on the same wavelength. The obsessive texture at the top is overwhelming when you view it side on. It's the surface quality that is causing the problem. After my post, I took the work upstairs in the kitchen which is my brightest room for viewing art. While the sky is my statement so to speak I don't want the eye to stay there. I have to fiddle with the bottom a little bit to make it more cohesive.
All that grayscale and flipping is making me anxious! I'm glad I "passed" because I have to say I just finished the sky and hung the painting on the wall. I had fill by that time.
You've taken an interesting painting and made it dynamic. Now there is intrigue. Pretty pictures are nice but impacting art always grabs you because there is something going on that you want to know more about; you want to dig deeper. Works that stand the test of time always have this ingredient. You are accomplishing this in your painting. IMHO. Beautiful piece!
Hi,, I personally like both versions...
that's not too technical of an answer, but I'm serious....
beauty is in the eye of the beholder...
well done on both accounts!
ciao bella
Nice rhythm and colors. I find the textures in green at the top to be of interest, plus I believe they broke the visual tension in that area. This lets my eye flow easier.
I feel that the webbing added charisma to the piece. The reason that the eye fixates on the sky may not be due to the change of texture. In the initial painting the few leaves bending back down helped the eye travel in a circular motion throughout the piece. In the newer version all leaves are shooting straight up, which in turn directs the eye upwards.
Personally I liked the overgrowth feel of the initial piece with glimpses of sky between the leaves, but as I mentioned I do like the added texture, it conjured the though of a spiders web.
On first look at the fix I didn't think of webbing--I thought you were portraying the delicate weeds that always grow alongside my day lilies; then weave among the leaves. I like the new version. Beautiful.
I get the sense of the flower starting its day in its infancy growing thru the day into its glorious maturity at which point it suddenly shatters against the ceiling of its short lifespan. My last impression ends there, since nothing takes me back into the composition to show this cycle recurring. We only get one shot at life...
-Don
I wonder what the crackling might look like in another section of the leaves, towards the bottom in the darkest area? For me the crackling is just on top...is it or will it work down into the piece? I like it...the first one was lovely but without mystery.
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